It's been a while. GCSE's are hard okay, don't look at me with those disapproving eyes. I've been trying to concentrate on my controlled assessments, but I just worry. I worry that everything i'm doing is pointless. I've been looking around colleges and sixth forms but I can't think of one subject I want to take for A-Levels. I thought about btecs but my family say they are pointless. I worry that if I leave my friends and go to college, I won't make any new ones. I keep thinking I'm wasting my life, I have no idea what I want to be or what I enjoy. All I know is i'd love to travel the world and that I'm interested in interior design. I can't even do that as i'm terrible at drawing.
Everyday I have been worrying about stupid things like, what if I go to college and get lost on my first day, or what if I forget to tie my shoelace in the morning. I don't know why but I've been super panicky about almost everything lately and I can't stop it. I just feel like after my GCSE's I have nothing, I will just do A-Levels and more exams. Then what? What happens after A-Levels? What if I don't get into uni? Do I even want to go to uni? What will I do if I don't? Will I end up living at home for the rest of my life?
I'm sorry that this was short and wasn't a very positive post, I think that is where I've been going wrong. I think I've been putting too much pressure on myself to be positive on here all the time but I've realised that writing down negative thoughts is okay. After all, by doing this, i'm sharing parts of my life and they isn't all good.Apparently writing down worries helps so I hope this works for me.
As always, here is a great quote to remember:
"Life is a roller coaster. You can either scream every time you hit a bump, or you can throw your hands up in the air and enjoy it."
Grace x
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